The Baby I Never Met

If things had gone a little differently, I’d likely be in the middle of preparations for a little one’s second birthday.  According to my math, the due date would have August 8^th, though it was never confirmed for sure and I’m well aware that there can be weeks between the due date and the actual arrival.  I thought I’d convinced myself the date meant nothing.  Instead I have been overcome with grief and, instead of it being the normal kind that just makes me feel bad, a nice (un)healthy dose of guilt has come along with it.